The way I see it everyone has their own parenting style and there are many that can be effective. Based on theory I do not believe that their is a certain “parenting style” that will work the best. For the sake of the question being asked, I feel as though the best answer for what type of parents produce the kids who are, “most likely to produce children who grow up to be happy, healthy, and productive members of society.” is the authoritative role. This may be biased, but I was raised on this system and I feel as though it taught me the rights and wrongs and what would happen in the events of both happening. This style of parenting taught me discipline while at the same time allowing me to understand my mistakes without harsh punishment. With this type of parenting it allows for order and experimentation which I feel is needed in the life of kids, but it also allows for a figure to set an example for the kids to follow. With this being said I still feel this type of parenting is determinant on how the parent uses this approach and can still be a very faulty system if it is not performed well.
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Hi! Could you possibly expand more on the parenting style? I understand that you mean authoritative, but to what extent and how so? Such as, what are some examples of this?
Could it be strict, hard rules that are put into place on topics such as talking back to parents, or getting a “poor” grade?
For example, (I am making just an assumptive guess) if a parent that uses your parent’s method saw their child stealing something from a convenience store, then the parent would use their role of “authority” and just cock an eyebrow, shake their head, or reprimand in a strong, defined tone, that the child should is wrong to do that because it is against the law; and hopefully, this would cause the kid to listen to the parent out of respect for their authority.
So, in this case, authority could be stemmed out of habits such as saying “yes mam” and “yes sir” to adults, especially the parents, or letting the child know that the parent is the boss in the house and that they ultimately have the say of what happens.
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I agree authoritative parenting was defientley the based parenting style for you, I am assuming you’re from an American house hold that holds true to the American cultural veiw of self importance. That is your success is based on your own gain not so much the success of an overall group. Now if you were from Asian descent and came from and Asian household (I know other cultures have the group outlook but I’m choosing asians Because I know the stat applies to them) studies have shown that the authoritarian parenting style is statistical more beneficial for the children’s development than authoritative. So you’re actually correct in saying you have a bias because in actuallity your parenting style worked best for you based on the culture you grew up in. On another note I may have offended you by saying children without both parents are at a disadvantage. I am sorry for the offense. Second I did not me that children without both parents are less likely to succeed I just want my post to be based solely on the parenting of a two parent household in a strong marriage for the posts sake. I understand individuals without both parents have the same opportunity to experience loving care givers and a loving caring single parent just for the sake of the post I chose to keep mine based on the old fashioned style of parenting. I appreciate people who didn’t receive dual parenting and believe they’re capable of successful development without both parents there for them.
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Actually De’Marcus, recent research has shown that authoritative parenting still produces better outcomes, on average, among Asian families as well. Here are a few recent studies (these happen to focus on Chinese and Chinese American parents, because the “Tiger parenting” moniker was developed by a Chinese American mother):
https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC3641860/
https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC3729394/
Click to access Social_and_Emotional_Parenting_Mothering20160326-22509-1csfdyy.pdf
Your point about cultural differences in parenting is still well taken though. What the research tends to show is families who come from non-European descent often have less negative outcomes with authoritarian parenting styles than families of European descent. In other words, the most positive outcomes tend to come from authoritative families, but when it comes to authoritarian families, the White children tend to have more issues as they grow up. Of course, these studies are all talking about averages, so the impact on individual families is hard to judge.
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****New comment****
(I couldn’t find out how to edit my previous post so I’m making a new one!)
I wanted to add something after reading the text-
The reaction of the kid is equally as important as how the parents choose to teach and raise their kids.This transaction is called “reciprocal socialization”. So, you never specified what type of child you were- in terms of reaction style. However, guessing by your satisfaction with how your parents’ parenting, I would guess that you were not rowdy and thus you would not evoke that “authoritarian control” side from the parents. (Comer, Gould 82.)
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